Jo M Thomas
1 supporter
Passage 3 - Off to see the wizard

Passage 3 - Off to see the wizard

Mar 28, 2022

"The wizard will know," it says confidently.

I'm tempted to ask what's behind the curtain but decide any attempt at joking would be wasted. This thing has no sense of humour and probably no reference. Oh, okay, maybe just the one.

"So," I say, "We're off to see the wizard?"

The face smiles but it's a simple, shallow smile. "Exactly so."

Oh, for f--

"That one must stand up," it says.

The arms that had been supporting my shoulders let go of me and I almost crack my head on the ground.

"What?"

Long-fingered hands are flapped at me. "If this one is to guide that one to the wizard, then that one must stand up and walk there."

"I'm not getting up until the world stops spinning," I mutter.

"Worlds do not stop spinning for insignificant little humans," it says. "Worlds spin because that is what worlds do."

I'm going to kill it. Slowly and painfully. When I don't have a hangover and can work out the best way to do it. When I'm sober enough not to make mistakes.

"Not that kind of spinning," I mutter.

I can't sit up and end up rolling over on to all fours. There is no dignity in enduring a hangover with strangers. It's bad enough around friends.

And that blasted thing is laughing at me. It doesn't even bother to hide its glee at my disadvantage. It even giggles something about "humans".

"That one is more ill than this one had thought," it says.

I struggle to kneeling and then standing on my own. I wobble but I can manage to stay upright, despite the ground's best attempted to buck and sway beneath me. T least now I know I'm still in the trees. This must still be that scrubby bit. Even if the trees do look taller and greener than I remember.

"I'll be better in a few hours," I say. "Maybe after a fry up."

It's always safe to assume diets don't count after a night out. Although I don't usually get drunk enough to have it this bad the next day. Getting that drunk can lead to saying things you don't want anyone else hearing, after all.

"'Fry up'?"

I wonder what planet this thing is from. So busy becoming something else and determined not to share in common references. I bet they spend every night staring at a wall instead of watching tv, thinking they're so much better than the rest of us because they have no idea what's going on in any of the soap operas.

"This wizard," I say. "Do we follow a yellow brick road or something?"

The face looks at me as if I must be feverish with the kind of nonsense I'm spouting. "No, just the path in front of that one."

It points.

I follow the line of the finger slowly.

I'm not sure I agree a line of muddy earth showing through rotting old leaves, weaving between great big trunks is really a path.

"That way?" I manage to ask.

The face nods.

I stumble forward.

Enjoy this post?

Buy Jo M Thomas a tea

More from Jo M Thomas