"I finished the washing up," the red-scaled woman says.
That's one way of putting it. I can see bits of broken crockery, the odd utensil and several pieces of cutlery just where we stand. I hate to think what happened to the rest, if only because I'm sure it will come out of my pay packet. That I never remember getting. Surely I should have been paid by now?
"I'm not sure this counts," I say slowly.
"It counts," Red protests. "If it worked for Heracles and the stables it can work for us and the washing up at the Eternal Banquet."
She's clearly an idiot. An enthusiastic idiot with access to a lot of water. I have no idea how she did it.
A familiar, loud voice says, "Hmph."
"Ah, there you are, my lovely," Red says to the sky.
I look behind me and upward. The zombie giant thing is looming over the buildings, squinting at me. This cannot end well.
"You did not complete your task," she booms at me.
I look around at the remains of my last job. "Well, there's no more washing up."
"You're not looking so good," Red says as if neither of us spoke. "I got a little worried about you when this one and her elf said they were looking for the Stone Circle, and that they couldn't find it because you were dead, and that the Eagle told them to come ask me when they said they had no idea where the Swamp of Sorrows was to start looking for you."
The zombie giant purses decaying lips. "You interfered, Dragon."
"I did not!" Red stares at her. If it were not impossible due to distance and scale issues, I'd say they were standing toe to toe, trying to stare each other down. "OK, I helped her a little bit. It was only a minor diversion of a river."
"Hmph," the giant says again.
"A teeny tiny bit," Red says, holding up finger and thumb separated by the distance of a a gnat's eyeball. "It was nothing really."
The giant shrugs. "To be fair, I want rid of her, too."
"Good. Good," says Red.
"And you!" the giant says to me, "do you regret the murder of the elf? Have you grown in the month since I saw you last?"
It's been a month? I really should have been paid by now. I need to talk to the manager of the restaurant.
"Yes," I say.
I regret the elf dying because I hate that I'm paying for it. It's not like I killed them. I'm fairly sure of that.
"Well, you can prove it by performing one last task," the giant says. "I demand that you-"
Red interrupts. "Oh, I can do this one. Plumtree, you must retrieve a feather from a flying fish!"