In December of 2020, we joined Tiktok in an effort to have fun during quarantine, as well as possibly make friends. We had been in therapy for years, but had only been recently officially diagnosed. We were shouldering a pandemic with children at home for school, constantly being triggered, having flashbacks, and processing trauma. We just wanted an outlet. A place to be funny, silly, and REAL. And to find other people who felt the same. The bonus was that although we were still VERY covert about our system on other platforms, on Tiktok we were free to open up. None of our IRL social media linked back to our account. So even though there was a chance someone could find us, it was so slim, we decided it was worth it. With our kiddos encouragement, we posted our first DiD Tiktok. It was executed badly. 🤣 We had no idea how to use the app. And we were so nervous. But we did it! And... nothing happened! We didn't suddenly get a flood of followers, or trolls. And that emboldened us more. So, we posted more about being a system. And other systems started following us! We started making friends! And not just ANY friends, people like us!! So, we just kept posting. We started posting videos explaining DiD basics, and sharing details about our system, And eventually people started asking us question. Now, we should say here, that it should be known we have ALWAYS loved psychology. We took pre-AP psych our senior year in high school, and then proceeded to take 1.5 years of psychology in college. We are in NO way experts! But we have done a lot of self education beyond the college education we did receive. It's definitely our big special interest. So when people started asking questions, we couldn't help but dig deeper. We started to track down every speck of information available about systems. We started asking other systems about their systems. We started analyzing our own system. True to the special interest trope- we dove head first into that rabbit hole, and found a home! So, we began sharing what we learned. We certainly didnt, and still don't, have all of the answers, but we became known for the phrase "We have a theory..."! The support we received, emboldened us even further. We started sharing more than just information. We started sharing our story, our experiences, our sense of humor, our pain, and our heart. So, here we were, sharing our diagnosis, sharing our life, and finding more and more love and support from other systems. We don't know exactly what video it came down to, or what "kid" it even truly began with, but once it began- it flooded! Every day we had more "kids" asking to be "adopted"- More systems asking for family. And we were more than happy to accept and love anyone! There was a reason why our original user name was @WildMommy. We have always loved working with kids. At one point, we had even been on track to become a teacher! Our life had always been filled with childcare, which is how we had earned that nickname! So, when people began asking for a "Mom/Sister/Aunt figure", we were more than ready! We had always been a safe space for anyone! And there was no way we couldn't continue to do that!
We have had our ups and downs on this journey. We have struggled with every video we have ever posted. Because this journey was more than just "being a tiktok creator", it was our life journey. The videos we made taught us more about our own selves. And we used videos to learn more about one another. We uncovered things about our system, and we healed along side other healing systems. By providing love and support to others, and receiving their love and support in return, we began learning how to love ourselves. By opening up about our experiences we discovered our fighting spirit. We had lived in silence for so long, hiding everything about us and everything we endured. We had suffered in pain and self hatred for so long, that every video became a fight song. Fighting for the injustice we had endured, fighting for others enduring the same, fighting for anyone who ever felt unheard or silenced. That's not to say that we haven't struggled to stay loud. The first time we were ever posted on reddit took a major toll on our mental well being. Even though we knew, logically, that they didn't matter, emotions are a beast. And when parts of your trauma include feeling unloved, unheard, and misunderstood, it only intensifies when a mass group of people make offensive assumptions, spread false information, and refuse to try to hear, and understand you. But ultimately, we weren't going to be silenced again. We had found our voice, and we never wanted to lose it again. But even in all of that mess, that rough part of the journey, we learned, we grew, we healed. While we would love to have NOT gone through it, it helped us through our own trauma. Which still, in no way, excuses the behavior of people in those spaces. We just like to always try to see the positive side of things!
We never expected joining tiktok to become what it is now, But we wouldn't change it! The issues and struggles we went through are worth the community, and family we gained. And it will always be worth it.
The Wyldlings