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Notes from the Enclave 12/4

Dec 04, 2020

The intersection of women, disability, and ADHD. 

We talked a bit about the notion of disability in general. Some of us don't consider ourselves disabled, while others do. 

If there's one thing I know for sure it's that ADHD rarely travels alone. 

I've yet to meet someone with ADHD who only had ADHD.

So perhaps it's the combo platter that makes life so challenging for some of us. 

If we don't recognize ADHD as a disability, then we can't ask for accommodations at school/work/life. Some of us have been in this precarious position and it's never a good thing. Advocating for yourself is hard. 

We spoke a bit about the idea of Feminism being harmful instead of helpful. 

  • women shouldn't have needs

  • women should put other's needs ahead of their own

  • women should pursue high-level careers

  • women should keep house/cook

  • women should look amazing while they do it

  • women should reproduce (if you don't you aren't family oriented)

  • women should not need to rest

  • women should not ask for help

You Can Have It All -


When you add into this toxic stew trauma, anxiety, ADHD (or other brain based differences) you have a recipe for confusion and self-hate. 

Nobody could possible live up to these standards. Not even the white men that seemingly still run the world

I made a short list of topics we want to discuss moving forward:

  • Invisible work in the world

  • Productivity

  • What we expect from ourselves v. what we think*** the world expects

  • Comparing ourselves to others, feeling like we have to work harder

  • Being kind to ourselves, but then feeling unable to sustain the self-compassion

  • We aren't in the driver's seat of our lives, and when we try we end up exhausted

  • Finding alignment between who we are, and who we to be (goals, aspirations)

Join us in the Enclave

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