On May 2, 2022, Politico leaked the Supreme Court draft opinion on overturning Roe v. Wade.
My mind was clouded the morning I read the news, my body heavy with anxiety from the weight of what the future could hold. All day, I thought about how data collected and reporting on domestic violence and rape, impact on state economies, mental health, poverty rates, and precedents for what constitutes a human right could all change for the worse.
I felt the anxiety of this potential future as a privileged, independent, financially stable woman with a strong support system living in California; was wracked with premature fear for those in less advantageous positions, those who would have to travel for reproductive healthcare, be financially decimated, and/or have to make choices about their body without friends/family/partners to support them.
I knew I needed to find respite in collective grief--something to fuel me, rather than paralyze me with fear, to take action--so, on May, 3, 2022, I took to the streets of Los Angeles.
In front of the U.S. Courthouse, I stood with thousands of other protestors to hear the opening remarks. In attendance were the groups Rise Up 4 Abortion Rights, Democratic Socialists of America, and Party for Social and Liberation.
Camera crews for major news organizations and independent journalists ambled about, capturing footage and quotes/stories from protestors about why they were in attendance and what this potential ruling would mean for them. Several women shared their stories about having had abortions themselves/having known people who have.
After remarks closed and direction was provided, we began the march to Pershing Square.
"Not the church, not the state, women must decide their fate."
"They say no choice, we say pro-choice."
At Pershing Square, speakers hopped on the mic to discuss the role of abortion in the political landscape as a whole.
They discussed the mobilizing and strategizing of Republicans and the ineffectiveness of Democrats in enacting any meaningful change. They dove into the need for momentum, ongoing protests, and organization in the pursuit of people power.
Protestors cheered and clapped for each speaker and the peaceful protest wrapped up.
It was only as we started heading down the stairs of Pershing Square to return to the courthouse that the climate changed.
An LAPD car drove up out of nowhere, unprompted.
Intimidation tactics were used.
Later, batons were brought out.
The sound of sirens began filling the streets.
Protestors were shoved, tackled.
There wasn't a single reason for cops to show up at the close of a protest to stop a riot that hadn't started, but they did and they turned a peaceful protest into a violent one by instigation.
I eventually headed back with other protestors to the courthouse.
There, we listened to organizers give their final final closing remarks; they emphasized their call-to-action: keep the momentum going.
I let the emotions from the evening sit with me as I made my way home.
Settled in in the same spot I'd first read the news, I felt a mixed bag of emotions--no longer clouded and heavy; instead, motivated by solidarity to continue learning more and working towards a more equitable America (one that respects bodily autonomy for one)... but also very aware of the hurdles and violence that will come with working towards that future.