Liz Riffle
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Thoughts on Being a Widow

Thoughts on Being a Widow

Nov 05, 2021

Yesterday I took my rings off. It's been a year. The weird thing for me is that my rings had become so much a part of me that I didn't feel them...and so not feeling them now... is ok. But then I remember or I catch a glimpse of my naked finger with the pale band of skin and I feel the urge to put them back on.

I was so angry yesterday. Waiting for the gas company to send out their person, fixing things that I didn't know how to fix, covered in cobwebs and paint... I feel so alone. But not alone in the lonely sense. Alone in the "I've got nobody to lean on, gotta take care of myself" sense. I'm not lonely. That's not surprising. I've always been ok with my own company. But being responsible for a ramshackle old house, 15 dogs, 13 cats, and myself...it can be exhausting...and frustrating...and (especially right now) financially draining. I mean 12 dollars for a hammer?

It's chilly this morning. Gotta get the heat turned on.

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