Feb 08, 2021
2 mins read
Thought I'd start this series called "What's On My Mind". Mainly because I just sat down to think of something to write and I couldn't form a single thought about one particular thing.
Instead, my brain has loads of things floating around, so I'm going to hopefully turn this into a weekly series.
It's a bit like the "brain dumps" I see on Instagram, but it's in blog form.
Ok here we go ...
- Getting sick of people telling me I'm too tired and there must be something wrong with me. Yes I get tired - but I have depression, anxiety and an auto-immune disease. Of course I'm tired! I don't think I'm any more tired than anyone else though and if I was concerned, I would see a doctor. I get people are worried, but honestly it doesn't come across that way sometimes. Sometimes it comes across that people think they know me better than me - based off of 6 minutes of stories they see each day.
- I was waiting for a shipment of an Apple power adapter and couldn't understand why it was taking so long ... turns out I didn't order it. Dumbass.
- Slowly unravelling my own "whiteness", couldn't think of a better word tbh. Everything I see and read online is very confronting and it's fascinating looking at my own thoughts and opinions now that I can see the society in which I was raised. I love who I am, and where I came from (e.g. ancestors) but golly I wish this world wasn't the way it was.
- Fatphobia ... also trying to unravel my own bullshit when it comes to this.
- The reality of life is really confronting sometimes.
- Love being sober and want to talk more about my experiences but get scared of the backlash from people.
- Speaking of sobriety, sometimes I still crave a glass of wine. Esp on a hot summer's day.
- When will people learn how to google the information for themselves, rather than ask me ... I then have to google it for them. Frustrating a tad.
- Am I ever going to get any work this year? It's very quiet.
- I need another glass of water - you should too.
- I feel like I need a really big cry.
- I still feel like I have no purpose in life.