Chris Nevard
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Hot Fuzz

Aug 28, 2022

Liz & Margo for the last week or so have been causing mayhem blasting around the Somerset Levels in their new bubble car. Anyone who knows the area, will know that the bouncy surface and random dog leg-bends (often for no apparent reason) will understand the hazard of going at any speed. All this isn’t helped by cattle being moved between fields along with other farming activities and lost hippies wandering the narrow lanes searching for signs of King Arthur.

This morning, the local ‘hot fuzz’ have blocked the road in anticipation. Much to their surprise, posh Liz and not quite to posh Margo extract themselves the bubble car. They were expecting a couple of urchins who’d hot wired the 3 wheeler.

This could create a difficult situation, for the local chief constable is rumoured to go hunting, shooting and fishing with royalty, and will look down severely at any activity tarnishing the aristocracy. And by pure chance that’s him walking his loyal hound Rodney. Oh.

After a few mutterings that sound like “My office Monday morning at 9”, the incident is soon wrapped up and brushed under the carpet - or in this case kicked in to the rhyne.

Regulars will note the similarity been chief constable and not so celebrated photographer Ivan Locksmith, there is no connection other than that they frequent the same country sports outfitters in that there Bath over the hills.

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