(CW: suicide mention)
Last week, my author copies of Suture arrived at my home, and it was incredible and overwhelming. I sat on the floor and I recorded myself opening the box, and I was so excited that I forgot to speak. This book has been ten years in the making - ten years! I am turning 30 later this fall: this book took my whole twenties, and now she's real.
Although the publication date is still three weeks away (September 21), with the book back from the printer, my publisher's distributor has started fulfilling orders to booksellers and libraries -- and while they are supposed to adhere to the on sale date, it doesn't always happen, so I had the extremely surreal experience of seeing my book at my local Indigo yesterday! Preorders will be arriving with you lovely people over the next few weeks, and those who ordered directly from my publisher Book*Hug will have signed copies & a little gift 💕 If you didn't preorder, you may be able to find it at your local indie bookstore or Indigo!
Part of what is all so out-of-body about this experience is knowing how different my life looked three years ago, before I got the e-mail from Jay at Book*Hug saying they wanted to publish my manuscript. Three years ago, I got a scheduled e-mail suicide note from a dead friend. Three years ago, I got the news that my little pile of stories would be published. Three years ago, I didn't know I was gay, I was struggling to get by in Toronto, and I couldn't figure out how to change my life. And look at me now?! I am engaged, I am a homeowner, I am surrounded by some of the most amazing people on this planet, and I am standing in an Indigo holding my book.
I can't wait for preorders to get to you, and I hope you read the acknowledgments, because there are so many people without whom I and this book would not exist, and I am so lucky, and I am so grateful. I didn't know this kind of happiness was real. This book means so much to me.
More soon, but I'll leave it there for now.
I love you!
Nic