Autism & comfort

Why is it so hard for my son to use the tools and equipment he has to help him?

He refuses to use fidgets

He refuses to use chews

He refuses to use weight vest

He refuses to use weight blankets

He refuses to use compression shirts

He opts to use power cords and ink pens to chew on

He opts to use anything other than the things he has to help him

Is it defiant behavior?

Is it too complicated?

Is it because he knows it's the right thing to do and refuses to do it?

The answer is yes to all of the above

He just does what's comfortable to him, even if his comfort is putting himself in danger

I spend so much time trying to convince him to use his equipment instead of using random things that will ultimately hurt him

It's so frustrating because I want him to stimm, just in a safe way

But he refuses

He refuses it all

I've gotten to the point of just giving up because it's too much

It's too stressful

It's depressing

It's frustrating

It's saddening

It's maddening

I've tried everything I can think of

And when I think I finally got through to him

Bam!

He's right back to doing the same things over again

It's like he can't retain what's right or wrong

He only retains what's comfortable to him

This is going to be a major problem when he's older

Because comfort isn't always safe

Comfort isn't always legal

His desire to be comfortable outweighs anything and everything

And that is going to cause major problems for him

So how do I solve this problem?

There is no definite answer

Only the hope that he'll eventually realize he needs to find comfort in the appropriate ways