WOWZERS . Hiding ADHD, hiding feelings, hiding symptoms.
Most of us share with family and partners. But** there are definitely circumstances where sharing ADHD and medication us with an ex, or at work, can be a NO GO.
There are some symptoms of ADHD that most of us hide/or have hidden in the past:
disorganization, clutter (hidden through rigid systems)
being chronically late, time blindness (hidden through hypervigilance, overplanning)
trouble following the thread conversation/responding appropriately/processing info (hidden by staying quiet, withdrawal from conversation)
inability to focus on one person/activity
It seems that many neurotypicals don't think about ADHD at all.
It's not on their radar until they are inconvenienced or offended.
Holding Back
Many of us hold back in our lives as a form of hiding. We might not speak up in meetings, or we adopt people pleasing as a way to move through life without inconveniencing anyone.
ADHD symptoms as a moral issue
Many of us recall hearing at some point that people who are chronically late are selfish. They just don't care. And we seem to internalize that to some degree today.
When you are late, or you cancel appointments people often interpret this as intentional behavior. Like you are not prioritizing this person/outing and you are FLAKY.
Logically we know ADHD is not a character flaw - but it's hard.
Downside of hiding:
increased anxiety
people pleasing
exhaustion
creating a bad pattern we carry into adulthood
never feeling SEEN or UNDERSTOOD
In short, we all hide sometimes. And sometimes it's ok.
You get to decide how much you reveal about your diagnosis on your terms.
But if you start to feel like nobody, "gets it," it could be because you are holding back, and hiding parts of yourself from the world.
You can't bee SEEN if you aren't willing to put yourself out there.