Those earlier days when I still
skipped and Irish jig down Decatur,
after leaving O'Flaherty's,
the music still in my head,
the beat still in my feet, and in
my heart.
Would that were all in my heart,
save you.
But I was in too deep, and took
your side, against my subconscious,
which still questioned.
When I sought reassurance, I'd only
sometimes get it.
You carefully parceled out
those gems of love,
bombs in disguise.
I was too good for you,
but I didn't see it.
My sense of self had already
been worn down
before I even came to town.
If only I'd never met you.
But I'll dream sometimes and visit
other realities and be
the me who never was.
For now, I'll move through the red
tape of a divorce, as I continue to grow
and thrive in the abundance of
my own self worth, creating
my dreams, and manifesting all
that was held back by my
oppressions, internal and
ex.
I am on the other side of you,
beside myself.