I'm being stupid.

I have a book idea right here and I'm wasting time. Not even procrastinating. Just not been in the right frame of mind.

Today, I've printed out the first draft of my book, Ted The Therapy Pony (WIP) and will be starting to work on it again offline. It's very bitty at the moment with seven chapters laid out with various amounts of writing already added but I still have a long way to go.

There's a kind of an ending in my head, and ideas for a number of chapters. Illustrations are in the really basic stage with one idea but I'm not overly happy with it to be honest.

But, why have I returned back to my book after so long?

Well, I've had enough of being seen as a mental health commodity. Someone to be experimented on or bullied into one particular form of treatment or therapy. I'm of an age now (50) where I feel I've had it with trying different kinds of therapy. I know the therapy I need and it includes horses. But, you see, it doesn't even have to be equine assisted therapy.

I just want to be with them. Enjoy them for what they are. Own one or loan one or just ride regularly. This is all I feel I need to 'fix' my mental health problems. If the NHS can't provide me with this then I shall go and look for myself.

So, the first step is to earn money.