Dec 18, 2022
1 mins read
I wrote this hi & froze.
Tomorrow I’ll be 40. And today, still at 39, I’m a speechless, frozen woman. Why?
I have different birthdays. The first one I remember is when I was 10 (or something like that). My birthday is on St Nicholas Day. So usually children here get presents. And I, 10 yr old (or something like that) girl, couldn’t understand: why my sister gets the same presents as me on my birthday?
Ok. Maybe at 10 (or something like that), I started asking questions about life.
There were birthdays I cannot remember. I rarely (never) celebrated properly. Why? Maybe because I celebrate life?
There were some birthdays when I was loved (strange to write things like that). There were birthdays when I was alone & probably sad or angry or just human. There were birthdays when I was ill or tired so much. There were birthdays when I got tons of calls or messages and when I was forgotten.
There were 39 birthdays of my life. How many did you have?
Tomorrow I want Kyiv & Ukraine won’t be bombed again. And I can go to the small café I found today. For morning warcoffee & some caramel writing. I’ll take my laptop & words with me. And grab these sweet words’ magic & write.
It was not bad December 18. Calm. Bombless. Even with some power.
It was very strange the 39th year of my life. Dressed in the war, new values & tremendous love for life. I don’t know how many birthdays I will have. I know that every day of our life is precious.
My sincere hugs from Kyiv,
Yara (or Yaroslava)
The picture? It was taken 3 years ago. Probably it was a very December day.